This is my journey from forced attendance at church to avoiding and ignoring all things religious and church-related. It is my long journey back to realizing I was searching for faith, not a church or religious group, but to find my faith. There are doubts about everything along the way. You will encounter daily small miracles, and large and small blessings. My encounter with a Lakota Sioux Shaman for a vision quest for my totem animal/guide. To my discernment for ordination. Along the way, I gain guidance from many different members of the Clergy, from my teenage years up to the present time. Each and every one of them had an impact. My journey was impacted or influenced along the way by family and a few friends. I hope you find my journey interesting and inspiring enough to think of your journey that you are on. I hope this book helps you allow yourself to embrace your own doubts and concerns without losing your faith.