Not all wizards were born to be heroes.
Things not to do when you find out you're a wizard:
#1
Do not destroy your apartment with magical fire. You WILL NOT get the security deposit back.
#2
Do not form an alliance with the guy who is trying to murder you. This will end badly.
#3
Do not drag the girl you're desperately in love with into your wizard mess. You risk her watching you fail miserably.
#4
Under no circumstances should you get in the middle of an epic magical battle. Death will happen. Lots of death and bad things.
This Epic Tome contains all four books in The Tale of Bryant Adams:
How I Magically Messed Up My Life in Four Freakin' Days
Seven Things Not to Do When Everyone's Trying to Kill You
Three Simple Steps to Wizarding Domination
Five Spellbinding Laws of International Larceny